Sunday, September 13, 2009

Haruskah aku berkarya lagi.. malasnyer..

Laziness is so overpowering. Tensed? Yup. Eldest son is getting married. Another son is far across the sea. Two daughters are maturing and never satisfy with their achievement n these 2 ears f mine aint capable of conceiving anything - anymore.
Tadi aku suka2 bkak MPH bestsellers dan ironinya, bertepatan hari ney 13hb, novel Kalimah Jiwa plak berada d carta ke 13. Kalau mat saleh daa menggigil takut..most of them are paranoid dgn angka 13!
Sometimes this chest starts promoting little pain. Very faint but..surely scaring. N headaches - it's a common cliche already. I heard a lot 'bout shock n it was so terrifying.
Eventhou shock may refer to few diff. condition but goodness knows.... what I mean is, 'that' serious condition - followed by sudden drop in blood pressure. Tol tak? Then this will be followed by harsh pain coz of d emotional strain. Konon kata, the plasma menerobos keluar dari dinding kapilari dan mendap ke tisu. Daa berpluh thun blaja psl 2, betul ke? Bende2 ni merendahkn tekanan darah . And the devoted heart f our's which try to overcome this by beating faster ends up with weakening heartbeat coz it does not receive ample blood. Kulit mula rasa sejuk and clammy, perspires tak henti2. Peparu dan ginjal fail to get rid of wastes properly. Dan bahan yg sepatutnya mengalami perkumuhan ni mula meracun. Hal ni dan lack of oxygen akan menyebabkan kematian tiba-tiba kalau X sempat d rawat.
Takutnya.. really scary and bloodcurdling. I won't force myself to write anymore coz writing won't be a commitment unless if you are really up to it. Tak semestinya when ur head is oveflowed wth ideas, semuanya mesti d terjemahkan k dlm bentuk mnskrp. Bley je simpan n publish them when you really set your heart 2 write. You have to enjoy writing 2 produce a good novel. I've done that with Sentuhan Cinta and I'm sure many appreciated d novel. Kalimah Jiwa d tlis kerna satu misi utk menyedarkn certain golongan dan Ku Mohon Kasih terluah kerna d satu kesempatan, I've witnessed few Kelantanese suffered greatly when their pasangan from other state left them in agony. Some were abandoned with one or three kids and left without a penny to survive. Sdehnya..ada yg merana sakit jiwa bler psgn hdup kembali k tempat asal to settle back with their first wife yg tak tau menau pun tntg prkhwnn bru hubby mereka yg plang dgn muka tak bersalah.
Hmm.. nantilah. Aku akan berkarya lagi..bila tiada tekanan. Menulis sambil menjiwai setiap plot yg terhasil dgn penuh komitmen dan kerelaan.. Supaya Moon trsyg tak pitam melihat manuskrp yg tunggang langgang..

3 comments:

Indah Hairani said...

salam...
masih sempat berujar salam idilfitri...seronok berlama di anjung haiza najwa..sy pasti akan datang dan datang lagi..tahniah!

Hz Njw said...

Hmm ..sama kte..I sering k blog U - hafal cerita U tntg kerinduan U akn org Padang yang entah ketahuan hidup atau tidak. A real novelist mmg miliki empati yang sgt luas dlm mnelusuri derita org lain . Begitu, simpati akn terluah tnpa d paksa-paksa. Cme yg se jiwa sj tau mghargainya. Be good alweyz..

PepSaya said...

Macam mana ye nak hilangkan bosan dan tak rajin, saya pun ada harinya malas yang amat sangat dan ada masanya bosan nak menulis blog